↗️ 8 Powerful Self-Coaching Questions to prepare your next crucial meeting |

Here’s a little extra nugget for us Leader Coaches…a set of questions that we can ask ourselves before important interactions.

They help open ourselves up to different ways how we can use the coaching mindset. It is a small buffet of questions; you don’t have to ask all of them (in fact, I would advise against it. By the time you are done, your meeting will likely be over), but just pick one that sounds like a good thought prompter.

Here we go:

1. What do I know about what success means for me and the other person(s) in this meeting? What must we get out of this to make it worth our time? (Comment: Ensure you are actually there for the same reason!)

2. What can I do to put myself in a state of curiosity and keep an open mind (despite what I believe to be true)? What can I do to stay away from judgment as long as possible? (Comment: No one wants to be judged. The moment you come across as judgemental, the other person is likely to go into Fight/Flight/Freeze. Conversation over)

3. In case of conflict: How could the other party see and explain their actions assuming they had positive intent? What are other possible explanations for what I saw happening? What assumptions do I make? (Comment: You know what they say? There are three sides to any conflict: yours, mine and the truth)

4. What must I do to ensure I am fully present in this meeting and ensure the other person feels respected and understood by me? (Comment: No, phone upside down is NOT good enough. It signals you are available to be interrupted. Be present physically AND mentally. Turn out your mental noise. It builds amazing trust.)

5. What are one or two questions I could ask to open up the other person’s thinking? (Comment: If you join the conversation to say whats only on your mind, you degrade the other person to a spectator. Be intentionally curious about the opinions of the other person and listen to their response!)

6. How could I enlist the other person in finding out about possible blind spots on my end? (there are always some things that others see, but we don’t). (Comment: Yes, asking in that area opens you up to criticism. A simple, gentle way to ask is ‘what can i do more or less of’? The only allowed responses by yourself? ‘Thank you’ or ‘Please clarify more’)

7. How should I adjust my style based on the level of trust I have with this person or group?

How can I contribute to maintaining/building trust? (Comment: What works with person A very likely does not work with Person B. Adjust your style. Create psychological safety first in any meeting, otherwise, people are just busy being self-conscious about they come across to you and others)

8. In the topic that is coming up: what specific approach could be most useful given the situation at hand? Advising? Mentoring? Coaching? (Comment: Think hard whether your should right away be the hero when your peer or team member asks you for a solution to a problem. If you are in the power position, they will likely just agree and you have learned nothing. Coach first and hear what they think. Ask ‘I wonder, what is your recommendation?’)

Again, not a checklist, but a helpful set of prompters that are especially useful before those very crucial conversations/meetings.

In effect, if you use the questions, you are doing a bit of self-coaching, which can bring you surprisingly far if taken seriously!

Enjoy!