🕑 2 min Read
Have you ever shared an idea with someone and received positive feedback, only to wonder if they were truly being honest or simply trying to please you?
➡️ INVITING TO DISAGREE
This is a common problem, but as a manager, it’s essential to create an environment where people feel comfortable disagreeing with you.
To do this, it’s important to invite criticism in a way that reduces the perceived risk of speaking up. One coaching technique is to “invite the other person to respond in ANY way to our contribution, including criticism.”
Here are three examples of how you might invite such disagreement:
➡️ A FEW EXAMPLES
💬 Manager: “Regarding the suggestion I just made, what do you think are two things that speak for and against it?”
(Encourages criticism while reducing the perceived risk of speaking up.)
💬 Manager: “I have an idea, but I recognize that I am absolutely not the expert here – you are. Please feel free to disagree with any part of it.”
(A preamble to invite openness, not as powerful as the one above.)
💬 Manager: “……that’s my idea, but I acknowledge it doesn’t address the cost overruns we talked about. What are your thoughts?”
(Gives an example of permissible criticism, lowering the bar for disagreement.)
➡️ SUMMARY
Intentionally using language that invites others to disagree with you is crucial when sharing ideas from a position of power.
There are many more ways to do this, but I think you get my drift! The key is to display the humility to be criticised.
Overall, the success of this depends on how you respond to what they say next. Are you honoring the risk they take or your statements above just platitudes?
Wishing you all the best in the coming week to make it safe for those around you to share their thoughts in all their colors!
Cheers, Maik
Maik Frank
Maik is a PCC Executive Coach and the founder of IntelliCoach.com. He has coached and trained over 400 People Leaders to improve their communication skills and offers guaranteed measurable growth to his clients. He also hosts the Coaching Leader Podcast.
Follow me
Get 1 Coaching Skills per Week
Every Sunday, we pick a tool, idea or skill from our paid courses and share it for free in our 1% Better Newsletter! You get practical things to apply right away in your upcoming conversations!
Feedback from our Readers:
"I am inspired to thank you for the valuable input that arrives in the inbox every week. Every Sunday, I take something from it for the coming week – thank you for that!" (Joachim H.)
"Super helpful. I'm in this position mentioned in the newsletter at the moment with a new coworker. I've used the suggested line with a level of success! I'll give this a go this week as well." (Mark D.)
"This is golden, Maik! You read my mind with this newsletter. Thank for you many times!" (Mubina A.)
🏢 IntelliCoach Pte Ltd.
Based in Singapore
UEN 201814680E
🔗 Contact Us
👥 About us
We create a world where every People Leader knows how to coach their team members. We give Leaders and Teams a magical toolkit to increase their performance and growth.