↗️ How to simplify life? Simplify the mind!

When I learned coaching years back, I remember one big AHA moment:

The goal of coaching not to guide by giving solutions.

The goal of coaching is to guide someone through self-discovery with clarity.

The fun thing is: once people have clarity and insight, they find it super easy to come up with their own solutions and run with them.

It’s our job as a coach to help someone to clear up the mess in their head, help them see patterns, see the red thread in their story.

And this can be surprisingly simple (but not easy).

Here are two ways:

1️⃣ Crisply summarise and present back themes and ideas

This is a foundational coaching skill. If you are able to summarise the essence of what someone just shared, it lifts them out of the depth of the complexity and helps them look at where they are from a higher altitude. They suddenly see things they previously could not.

Pro Tip 1: The more concise you are, the more powerful!
Longer summaries = more confusion.

Pro Tip 2: User numbers and labels to make things even clearer.
“I hear you want 2 things here…”

2️⃣ Help the other person stay on target

As coach, we do not guide the other person in terms of the content of their ideas and solutions.

However, we help them stay on track in the conversation on their path to self-discovery.

Imagine a coachee says they want to talk about how to deliver a presentation better, and then they suddenly shift to discussing a conflict with a co-worker.

We must notice this conversation shift, point it out (without judgment) and inquire about the relevance of this focus shift. Our coachee will either go back to the previous goal or justify the new direction, both of which is fine.

What matters is that we heightened their awareness on the shift and understood its meaning.

This is an essential technique not just to keep coaching conversations on target, but any meeting, for that matter.

💡 Summary

Professional-level Coaching is not about solutions, it is about helping someone achieve clarity and insight. Clarity creates energising aha moments. That’s the magic sauce!

If this sounds theoretical, just try this: switch away from being a SOLVER to a SIMPLIFIER in your next conversation.

Stop solving for the other person. Don’t give them advice. Instead, try to help by summarising succinctly, by helping them stay on track towards what they want to achieve.

You will likely be surprised about the amazing impact you will have by simply helping someone clear up their own mental mess.

Have fun with it 🙂 I wish you a great, simple, powerful week ahead!

Maik