🕑 2 min Read
As a manager, I've made my fair share of mistakes, but looking back, the worst one was delaying or skipping my 1:1s with team members. I used to have "good" excuses, like something important and urgent that required my attention. Deep down, though, I thought I was too busy for regular check-ins with my team. In hindsight, I realize how much damage it caused. I fit 1:1s around my other work, but I now know I had it upside down and wish I could turn back time.
To quote Steven G. Rogelberg, a management professor at UNC Charlotte and author of The Surprising Science of Meetings, "The best managers recognize that 1:1s are not an add-on to their role—they are foundational to it. Those who fully embrace these meetings as the place where leadership happens can make their teams’ day-to-day output better and more efficient, build trust and psychological safety, and improve employees’ experiences, motivation, and engagement."
I could not agree more.
From this experience, I learned some key lessons:
1. Regular 1:1s are the bedrock for trust and communication with my team. Skipping regularly will slowly destroy the connection.
2. I make 1:1s a non-negotiable part of my schedule and fit other meetings around them. This sends a message to my team that I value them.
3. My consistency in running 1:1s directly impacts engagement, productivity, and retention. As a manager, I am the most important connection point between my team and the organization.
4. Missing one 1-1 may be no big deal. It happens and is ok. But missing 3 in a row sends a message of ‘It’s not important to me’, however valid my individual reasons may be.
5. Finally, every 1:1 presents coachable moments, where I can strengthen team members' feelings of ownership and motivation. 1-1s are a prime opportunity to fully use the professional-level coaching skills that I teach in my IntelliCoach PRO program.
In summary, my learning is clear: as a People Manager, my prime job is to support and empower my team. My 1:1s with team members are the most important vehicle for achieving that. I know that now and I will work hard to convey this message to any Leader I meet.
What’s your experience with missing 1-1s?
Maik
Maik Frank
Maik is a PCC Executive Coach and the founder of IntelliCoach.com. He has coached and trained over 400 People Leaders to improve their communication skills and offers guaranteed measurable growth to his clients. He also hosts the Coaching Leader Podcast.
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